n MFW’s latest encounter with Nick Hart – creator of the brilliant Achtung! Millwall podcast – we have sensibly decided that if it ain’t broke don’t fix it and once again put the ball entirely in his court and asked him to give us the lowdown on how things are going down at the New Den right now, as well as asking for the inside track on a certain recently-transferred glovesman.
Last time Nick weaved a magical tale of how Millwall derived part of their strategy from studying the efforts of children’s TV antihero Dick Dastardly to catch Yankee Doodle the messenger pigeon – to great response from our readers:
CITY v MILLWALL (A) – THE PREVIEW (myfootballwriter.com)
But can he top that this time around as we prepare to welcome the Lions and their supporters to the Carra at the unearthly hour of 12 noon on Sunday?
Judging by the opening sentence, there’s a strong possibility. All yours, Nick.
“1968 was a dramatic year in world events. The Vietnam War raged in SE Asia. The Soviet Union invaded Czechoslovakia. Rioting students seized Paris.
“Most sensational of all though?
“Millwall won 3-0 at Carrow Road. A goal from Derek Possee and a pair by Keith Weller sealed the last victory for the Lions in the fair city of Norwich, some 55 years ago [Weller and Possee, they were proper players they were – Martin].
“Quite why Millwall have managed to make our trips to Norfolk into some kind of Fortress Delia is frankly beyond me.
“Where we’ve always prided ourselves on making awaydays to Bermondsey feel akin to a trip to a high-security facility, I’ve always found a trip to a East Anglito be very pleasant. It’s one of those odd twists of football fate, that we do tend to struggle in such a bastion of niceness.
“When you add in the Sky TV dictated Sunday morning kick-off, forgive me if my expectations from Sunday don’t go much further than a point.
“That said, Gary Rowett is a manager who seems to have more success on the road, where he can defend, scuffle, and hit on the break than he does at Zampa Road, where the pressure to attack the opposition from kick-off to the 111th minute [under new guidelines] is constant.”
Having Gary Rowett as manager is like being in a loveless marriage
“One of the guests on our ‘Achtung! Millwall’ show speaking after last Saturday’s dire home loss to Bristol City compared the relationship of Rowett to the Den faithful as being that of a loveless marriage. One where we’re reasonably well off, but in reality keeping up appearances ‘for the kids’ [neither Dean Smith nor our supporters could even be bothered to keep up the illusion after about three months – Martin].
“Anyroad, without wishing to delve any further into the world of sexless relationships, you posed a few questions ahead of Sunday’s super soaraway shoot out, so let’s have a look at the issues” [disclaimer: I did not refer to Norwich City v Millwall FC by using any of Nick’s words beginning with an ‘S’ – Martin]:
I did however kick off by asking him about the background to our very recent signing of keeper George Long and his quoted burning desire to be a No.1 somewhere as it wasn’t going to happen for him at Millwall. What do we need to know, Nick?
“Yes, George Long, hmm … well … how can I answer this?
“As some Canaries might know, Millwall were playoff contenders for a fair slice of last season. Mainly due to Gary Rowett’s pragmatic ‘lie back and think of England’ approach to football.
Flapping, mishandling and comedy goalkeeping
“This all fell apart over the final five to ten matches of 2022-23, a part of which (not all) was adjudged by the members of the jury at Zampa Road to be thanks to George Long flapping, mishandling, and generally indulging in comedy goalkeeping for a number of critical goals conceded.
“The truth is that the whole defence was at fault. But Long caught the rap and, going by pre-season at least, his nerves have become shot and his confidence fraught.
“On balance, I believe he’s a decent keeper, without being a great one. He may come good in the more forgiving Norwich atmosphere and I hope he does.
“He seems like a pleasant bloke who always gave me a sense of a locum RE teacher but, in truth, he was ill-suited to the gladiatorial arena that is Millwall on the eternal hunt for the big time.”
I followed up by asking Nick if he and his club, in general, have recovered from the so-near-yet-so-far experience – the play-offs were a real possibility for a long, long time – a bit too long for the South London outfit to cling on in the end.
“Myself, yes, I’m over it. After 50+ years following Millwall, I learned (around 1975 actually) that you have to manage your expectations at first Cold Blow Lane and then Zampa Road.
“Thanks to the mad world of social media, some of our younger fans seem to have built up a delusion that we can (or should) compete for play-off football every year. When in truth, these runs are rare achievements historically speaking.
“’Shut up you miserable old git’, I can hear them saying.”
Don’t worry mate. Gary G, me, and quite a few of the MFW regulars get to hear those immortal words with monotonous regularity at our end too. Kids, eh! 
Next question off the conveyor belt asked Nick to consider whether Millwall supporters are still basically content with Rowett?
Rumblings of discontent could be heard last Saturday
“Rumblings of discontent could be heard last Saturday. Nobody likes being beaten with the last kick of the game, but the poor quality of the performance plus the holding back of some of the most talented youngsters seen at the club in years is testing the patience of the Millwall support.
“And if there’s one thing we’re renowned for, it’s our patience isn’t it?”
‘Renowned for our patience’ – that’s supposed to be us, Nick mate. Until the subject of share issues and balance of power swings at board level is raised, then things can get quite feisty – by Norfolk standards anyway! Martin.
As we were talking of youngsters, I asked if the Lions had anybody new we should watch out for.
“Romain Esse and Aidomo Emakhu are two seriously talented and hungry youngsters. Pace, ability and confidence in bundles. If we’re lucky, Rowett might bring them on with five minutes to go.”
And finally, it’s our turn to host the cameras – will this affect how many Millwall fans make the journey, what with the early kick-off and all?
“I believe we’ve sold well for this match, despite the unfriendly timing and the poor display versus Bristol recently. I had to laugh at the calls by some on Twitter to move the kick-off to accommodate the Women’s World Cup final.
“Do leave off, people have paid money for trains, accommodation and so on!”
Nick was feeling generous enough to chuck in his score guess free, gratis and for nothing:
Norwich City 1, Millwall 1.
Dick Dastardly couldn’t make it this time but luckily Nick Hart could, so thanks to him once more for his input about the Millwall side of life.
And to announce our first League encounter with a cub from the Great Big City this season, you will find nothing to match this, either culturally or musically:
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